Andre Agassi in Cannon ad: "Image is everything."

Andre Agassi in Nike ad: "That was weird."

Radio announcer calling Barry Bonds' 71st home run near the end of the 2001 Major League Baseball season.

Bobby Bowden: "Hi, this is Bobby Bowden of the Florida State Seminoles."

Chicago Cubs announcer Harry Carey: "Holy cow!"

Jimmy Connors in Nuprin ad: "This party ain't over, kid."

Intro to Howard Cosell's radio show.

ESPN announcer Peter Gammons: "The Dodgers wonder why everybody hates them. Well, they should just listen to themselves."

Howard Cosell: "I think Joe is hurt. Angie Dundee, Ali's trainer, right next to me, is saying it. You might hear him... Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier! Down goes Frazier!"

George Foreman: "I'm so big, sometimes I even scare myself!"

Russ Hodges: "The Giants win the pennant!" etc., etc.

Bo Jackson in Nike ad: "You know I don't have time for this!"

George Foreman: "But I do! Hit it!"

Music follows.

Bo Jackson in Nike ad: "Lemme outta this thing!"

Bo Jackson in Nike ad: " 'Scuse me."

Bo Jackson in Nike ad: "Now where's this Tour de France thing?"

Michael Jordan: "Hi, I'm Michael Jordan."

Rob Schneider: "Michael Jordan!"

Jordan: "And I'm hosting the season premiere of Saturday Night Live."

Schneider: "Host-a-tola!"

Jordan: "With musical guest, Public Enemy."

Schneider: "Fightin' the Power-a-roonie!"

Michael Jordan: "I better eat my Wheaties."

Lou Gehrig in Yankee Stadium saying goodbye to baseball: "Today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth."

Announcer 1: "Yeah, this could be the record breaker right here."

Announcer 2: "Colts showing blitz. Marino changing."

Announcer 1: "Byars!"

Announcer 2: "Byars goes in! Marino has the record! So a six-yard touchdown pass from Dan Marino to Keith Byars separates Marino from Fran Tarkenton, and from this point forward, every touchdown pass Dan Marino throws will establish a new NFL record."

Marv Albert: "Second and nine, and throwing sideline, and he has the record. Irving Fryar on the catch! Dan Marino has now thrown for more yards than anyone else in the history of the National Football League."

Hank Williams, Jr., singing: "Are you ready for some football?"

Joe Montana: "Oh, you won't disturb me. I'll be in my room masturbating." (appearing on Saturday Night Live)

Joe Namath: "I'm Joe Namath. Good night."

Joe Namath: "Now, I don't wear pantyhose, but if Beauty Mist can make my legs look good, imagine what they'll do for yours."

First few bars of the Olympics theme music.

Announcer: "A perfect score! Ten-point-zero for Nadia Comenici! A perfect score!"

Kathy Rigby: "The first time! I've never seen anyone get a 10!"

Magic Johnson: "Because of the, the HIV virus that I have attained, uh, I will have to retire from the Lakers."

Pete Rose: "I gambled on other sports, other than baseball. I never gambled on baseball, but, uh, I think I'm being punished pretty severely." (after being banished from Major League Baseball because of his own personal gambling scandal. Rose's book, My Prison Without Bars, is supposed to shed more light.)

Nolan Ryan in Advil ad: "I feel ready to go another nine innings."

CBS sportscaster Sean McDonough's call of Francisco Cabrera's game-winning hit off of Stan Belinda in the bottom of the 9th in game seven of the 1992 National League Championship Series in which the Atlanta Braves defeated the Pittsburgh Pirates after trailing two-to-nothing in the bottom of the 9th: "He hacked at the two-oh, now the two-one... Line drive and a base hit! Justice has scored the tying run, Bream to the plate, and he is... SAFE!! Safe at the plate!! The Braves go to the World Series!"

Steve Spurrier: "Ya know, it's just time to move on." (January 2002, announcing his resignation as head football coach at the University of Florida)

Headline News announcer describing Alabama's 34-to-13 win over top-ranked Miami in the January 1993 Sugar Bowl.

Don Meredith singing: "Turn out the lights; the party's over."

Jim McCay: "The thrill of victory... and the agony of defeat." (ABC's Wide World of Sports)

Mike Ditka: "See that, buddy? That's your I.Q. -- zero!"