Television:
The Sopranos      page 1     page 2

Tony Sirico as Paulie Walnuts: "You don't answer your f***in' phone? I tried you 50 times last night."

Steven Van Zandt as Silvio: "I would suggest something in the way of, uh, of an apology."

Bruce Altman: "I'm aware we have a contract in place... Please, I'm an attorney."

Bruce Altman: "Please, I'm an attorney... I can tort you into the poor house."

James Gandolfini: "From now on, I'm gonna take a bigger hand in this s***."

James Gandolfini: "But, this s*** I'm tellin' ya... it'll all blow over."

James Gandolfini as Tony Soprano: "Oh, this boring cocksucker. Jehovah's Witnesses are more interesting."

Dominic Chianese as Uncle Junior: "Federal marshals are so far up my ass, I can taste Brylcreem."

Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano: "It is neverending, your bulls***."

James Gandolfini: "Ya know what? This is f***in' bulls***."

Frank Vincent as Phil Leotardo: "Bye-bye. Wave bye-bye, Grampa. Bye-bye, Papa."

Frank Vincent: "We can't go back. Are you out of your f***in' mind?"

James Gandolfini: "Now, I know you think I'm like a hard, cold, captain-o-industry type... That's not all there is."

Edie Falco: "Any marriage would need fidelity."

James Gandolfini: "Like Popeye says... I yam what I yam."

Falco: "Well, I didn't marry a cartoon."

Nancy Marchand as Olivia Soprano: "I can't eat that. It's got cholesterol."

Edie Falco as Carmela Soprano: "I made it with the low-fat cheese."

Marchand: "Yiucchhh."

Maureen Van Zandt as Gabriella Dante: "Hillary Clinton? I can't stand that woman."

Sharon Angela as Rosalie Aprile: "The president of the United States, for cryin' out loud? Look at what his wife had to put up with, with the blowjobs and the stained dress."

James Gandolfini: "F***in' bitch... and complain, and f***in' bitch, bitch, bitch!... F*** it!"

Vincent Curatola as Johnny Sack: "Maybe there's a compromise here then."

Tony Lip as Carmine: "There's always a compromise."

James Gandolfini: "Conserve!"

James Gandolfini: "You're f***in' crazy."

Edie Falco: "This is such a crock of s***."

Jamie-Lynn Sigler as Meadow Soprano: "The state can crush the individual."

James Gandolfini: "New Jersey?"

Sigler: "The government... specifically the federal government."

Bruce Altman: "I can show damages."

Frank Vincent: "We decapitate and we do business with whatever's left."

Michael Imperioli: "She's got diarrhea."

Jamie-Lynn Sigler as Meadow Soprano: "Did I do something to piss you off?"

Drea de Matteo as Adriana La Cerva: "I didn't do nothin'."

Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Melfi: "And this is something you're contemplating?"

James Gandolfini: "What?... It'd be a disaster... of major proportions."

James Gandolfini: "He disrespected the Bing."

James Gandolfini: "Don't do it! I'm warnin' you! Do not do it!!"

Annabella Sciorra as Gloria: "Don't go, don't go!"

Nancy Marchand: "I don't know what you're talking about."

James Gandolfini: "You don't know me at all."

Edie Falco: "I know you better than anybody, Tony, even your friends... which is probably why you hate me."

Nancy Marchand: "I don't like that talk!"

Background music: Journey's Don't Stop Believin'.

James Gandolfini: "I went ahead and ordered something for the table."

(Last line of the final episode, including all the final seconds of audio.)

James Gandolfini: "Don't get dramatic now, all right?"

James Gandolfini: "I had a dream last night... Ahh... My bellybutton was a Phillips-head screw, and I'm walkin', unscrewin' it, and when I get it unscrewed... my penis falls off... ... Ya know, I pick it up, and I'm holdin' it, and I'm runnin' around, lookin' for the guy who used to work on my Lincoln when I drove Lincolns so he can put it back on... and, ya know, I'm holdin' it up, and this bird swoops down and grabs it in its beak and flies off with it."

Lorraine Bracco: "... What kind of bird?"

Gandolfini: "I dunno... seagull or somethin'."

Bracco: "A water bird?"

Robert Iler as Anthony Soprano, Jr.: "You people are f***ed. You're living in a dream."

Lorraine Bracco as Dr. Melfi: "In your worst dreams, a duck flies off with your penis."

Michael Imperioli as Christopher: "Ya never know. I could be on the endangered species list."

Edie Falco: "Well, let me tell you something... Everything comes to an end."

James Gandolfini: "Most expensive piece o' ass I ever had."

James Gandolfini: "Oh, f*** that."

Tony Sirico as Paulie: "Nobody knows what the future holds... my friend."

Edie Falco: "What's different between you and me is you're going to hell when you die."

James Gandolfini: "Oh, don't worry... I'm goin' to hell when I die."

Edie Falco: "Be a good Catholic for 15 f***in' minutes! Is that so much to ask?!"

James Gandolfini: "I'm chalkin' all this up to female menopausal situations."

Lorraine Bracco: "You're not my gynecologist."

Gandolfini: "Well, you don't need a gynecologist to know which way the wind blows."

Edie Falco: "You are so f***ing hateful."

James Gandolfini: "What the f*** do you know what goes on in my head?"

Jason Cerbone as Jackie, Jr.: "You wanna spend the rest of your life with your head up your ass? Be my guest."

Steven Van Zandt: "I probably shouldn't be tellin' you this, but, since you asked... I think certain people are startin' to wonder where your heart is."

Jamie-Lynn Sigler: "Hi, it's me. What are you doing?"

Edie Falco: "You f***ing hypocrite."

Edie Falco: "More is lost by indecision than by wrong decision. That's all I'm saying."

James Gandolfini: "More is lost by indecision than wrong decision."

David Margulies as Neil Mink: "Eighty to ninety percent chance you'll be indicted."

James Gandolfini: "F***in' Internet."

James Gandolfini: "Log off. That cookie s*** makes me nervous."

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